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Broken Hearted and I need help

UserPost

1:20 pm
March 18, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

sad sack,

I know it's easier said then done about keeping busy. I know when your every thought goes back to analyze it over and over again in your head.

I think you are not giving yourself enough credit here, I do think he meant all those things he said to you but his depression has taken him over. It most likely is making him unable to verbalize to you what is going on in his head. I’m sure he is thinking he is not good enough for you and that you are better off without him.

What about his past relationships? Did he ever mention anything about any other relationship?

It’s so easy for us to blame ourselves when a good relationship seems to go bad. We fill our heads with the what ifs and if onlys. I think time will help you realize it was not you at all bit his depression that got in the way of your relationship.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

2:39 pm
March 18, 2007


thedogsmom

New Member

posts -1

I too am broken-hearted. At this stage- it's a battle between the heart and head. Are we really 'wise?' if we KNOW that we need to keep busy, and move on. and let go…and keep excercising and living our lives—BUT we Don't follow through?? does that make us foolish?
I'm beginning to think that I am an IDIOT because I AM SMART enough to KNOW what to do in MANY areas of my life– I have the 'knowledge' but I don't follow through with the actions- and I think that makes ME and IDIOT. I KNOW to I NEED to excercise–I have a million books and videos and equipment and a gym membership that I pay for every month– I READ the HEALTH books and KNOW how and what I should EAT to stay healty…BUT I DON'T DO what I READ or KNOW!
I'm doing only THAT which needs to get done- GO to WORK– pay my bills–do my taxes. etc.. but the excercise…. the taking care of myself…getting my health check-ups.. choosing HEALTHY foods to eat. pampering myself… I'm NOT doing.

I'm giving advice and telling you all to do it! But I'm NOT doing it myself!
I eat fast food or don't eat at all cause I'm too depressed/lazy/no motivation to cook and eat healthy.

I too waste my days in bed– TRYING to sleep to put all those "thoughts dancing in my head" to REST. And I still wake up TIRED and sometimes with anxiety.

I'm getting sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm really angry at myself and getting SICK of myself!

okay- I vented — reading my posts and goodbye letter(((s))) that I SENT Him LONG ago–helps ME to see HOW LONG this has been going on…and how time is a slipping away– while I'm surviving BUT NOT LIVING!

In my quest to end this pain and suffering– my self-discovery however is getting me to the place where I feel CHANGE for the BETTER is coming! I KNOW that I have to MAKE changes for that to HAPPEN. So I want to just say that WE shouldn't look at it like we WASTED 3 years or 5 years or xx years with this person… IT wasn't ALL a WASTE of life. WE did have some exciting great times and times we felt loved and were happy! That's why it's hard to let go. That's what we remember and keep focusing on — the HAPPY times with HIM! IF they were TRULY ALL BAD– IT would have been a waste!

But it doesn't really MATTER –IF HE REALLY loved me?? or used me??? or played me????? It doesn't matter IF it was the depression…or he was having an affair…or if he met someone else…or IF he is married or IF it was the drugs or lack of character.
What matters is where do we go from here to get to that PEACE and HAPPINESS?
Do we KEEP living in our heads as atalose said "analyzing over and over–Was it all a lie???"
Or do we just start taking those positive baby steps moving FORWARD instead of in CIRCLES!
from the wise FOOL..:)

7:36 pm
March 18, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

Thank you all again for taking the time to write such thoughtful and insightful messages. I am sort of overwhelmed at the support that I am receiving here. I value each and every one of the comments that you all have made. I cannot write much now because I must go to pick up my son, but I did want to briefly comment. I will write more later on when I have some free time.

I will try to address some of your questions. In terms of his past relationships, I know he had a few. Yes, he was married and he is still on a friendly basis with his ex-wife. He would talk about his past relationships but I made it clear that I really wasn't interested. I never ever asked about his wife. I just felt that the past is the past so I never really cared to hear about that part of his life. Now I wish I did know a little bit more because it would offer some insight into how he conducted himself.

Atalose, you feel that it is his depression that caused him to behave the way he did. I am not so sure. He was depressed before but we always seem to be able to work through it. There were times he wanted to be alone and I gave him the space. But, he always came back and talked about it or wrote to me about it. He never shut me out like this and for so long. Perhaps, he just saw me as an interference with regard to his scholarly work. He did say that since he met me, he was not able to accomplish as much work. He works seven days a week. Once when I stayed over, I wanted to spend some time in bed with him (just to talk) and later he threw it up in my face that I did not respect the fact that he had work to do. You see as soon as he gets up, he immediately goes on the computer and starts working. Can you believe that? That was one of our biggest arguments. I think being successful in his professional life is more important than being successful in a relationship. Towards the end of our relationship, he seemed to be more and more interested in his work. I guess I did notice a change in him in that regard, but I really did not suspect that the end was near. He gave me the impression that he was in this for the long haul.

Well I better get going, but I will write more later. I still want to comment on some of the messages that I received. Thanks again to all of you.

11:59 am
March 19, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

TMV109 – I wanted to thank you for writing such a thoughful response. It was very much appreciated. I am so sorry that you had to go through a painful breakup, as well. But the good thing is that you seem to be at a much further place in terms of recovery. I am still in the pathetically sad stage. You see your ex for what he was – I am still probably in the denial stage. But I do see some similarities. When you mentioned that you could never say anything negative about your ex, I could somewhat relate. Whenever, I would share my hurt feelings with my BF, he would turn it around as if there was something wrong with me. He never took responsibility for hurting my feelings. He would say I was being way too sensitive. He would even get annoyed with me over it. That is one of the reasons I hesitate to even send him any kind of final letter – he would just turn it around and make me look like I did something wrong. I, too, hate to come home. If I could work extra hours, I would. I hated this weeekend because I had so much free time to think. You are an inspiration, because it seems like you are really doing positive things for yourself. I am not there yet. A friend suggested taking a trip, but I know I would be miserable if I did that. I understand how hard it would be for you to see your ex (especially with another woman). That would destroy me. Luckily, my ex lives in another state so it is unlikely that I would run into him.. There is a chance if we both are in the city at the same time, but the chances are slim. I left a piece of computer hardware over at his apartment. I know I will have to go and get it one day. I am dreading that, because I know seeing him would just break my heart all over again. That is admirable that you are going for counseling. I may look into that. I guess I don't have much faith in counseling since it was unsuccessful before. I know there are good counselors out there. It is just that I have yet to find one. Well, I need to get back to work. Thanks again for taking the time to share your story with me. It does help to see someone who has made great strides to heal her broken heart. I hope I could do the same.

1:45 pm
March 19, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

My ex-husband was a workaholic, he was never praised at all by his father, and as a matter of fact his father would constantly put him down for just about everything. My ex went on a crusade of sorts seeking approval and praise in the work field. Although he was never going to get that approval from his own father he kept on trying.

What ever the reason your bf is a workaholic he will remain like that just as any other addict until he sees it and seeks help for himself. His life is off balance.

The blame he is putting on you for not respecting his working, it no different then any other addict who uses blame to deflect away from them.

Addiction is progressive and depression can be as well. Either way without outside help this man is going to remain exactly as he is today. With out balance in his life there will never be room for a relationship.

Please stop thinking in terms that you did something wrong or caused this to happen. Again like any other addiction, you did not cause it, you cannot cure it and you cannot control it.

There are two major factors working against things here, depression and addiction.

No matter what you could have said or done, those facts will never change and neither will he until he seeks help for himself.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

2:56 pm
March 19, 2007


doubleloss

Guest

hi sadsack. i'm also reading this thread as i'm so stuck in the same rut than you are, but it's been months for me. the worse part is that i'm keeping busy, eating well, socializing, doing things i like and i feel that is just keeping me from sliding into a deep depression. but maybe the hard work will eventually pay. it's hard not to think about what is wrong w/us that we are not wanted by these men, BUT atalose has it right, their depressions/addictions/lack of whatever has really nothing to do w/us. so,it is very hard to wrap my brain around that. anyway, i hope you have a better day. double

3:50 pm
March 19, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

hi. Thanks again to all of you who have taken the time out of your very busy days to shed some light on my situation. I appreciate all of the support you all have given me. Atalose – your description of your work addicted ex-husband sounded so eerily similar to my ex boyfriend's situation. He, too, grew up in a very dysfunctional home where he got little praise from his dad. According to him, his dad was outright abusive. As a matter of fact, he now hates his dad and presently is estranged from him. Even though he has a doctorate degree, teaches at a huge university, and has written many articles for professional journals, he still considers himself a loser. You are right. There was nothing I could say or do that would have made him feel better about himself. ANd I do think he saw me as the other woman who was coming in between him and his work. In the beginning of the relationship, it seemed okay. He found a balance (somewhat) but then lately, he saw me (and the time he spent with me) as the reason he had not been more productive.

I always knew he was a workaholic. I accepted that. I was not the type that needed all that much attention. And I was certainly not the type who required constant togetherness (I hate that). I guess it got to the point where I was not worth his time anymore. That really hurts. I still cannot understand why he did not offer any explanation to me. I really thought he loved me. But anyway, you are very wise and I appreciate you taking the time to write to me. Your words have made a significant change in how I view things.

Doubleloss – it sounds like you are doing the right things. You inspire me. I know it is hard work and I am convinced that it will pay off. I am not at that point yet. I am still at the "do I really have to get out of this bed?" stage. As I said, it is a good thing I have a job. Otherwise, I would be stuck in this bed. I know it takes time. Thanks again. I have to believe that things will get better for all of us. Try to have a good day.

4:01 pm
March 19, 2007


risingfromtheashes

st regis falls, ny

Member

posts 14

sad sack….

you wrote – There were no codependency issues going on (as I experienced in other relationships). We were not out to fix each other.

I wonder if that is true or if you just didn't see that it was going on.

Sometimes we pick the "same guy" but in a "different package".

And tho he wasn't a drug addict or alcoholic, he WAS addicted to work, AND he has depression.

I wonder if you ever felt like it was your job to cheer him up…or you didn't rock the boat because you didn't want him to go into another round of depression. How much did you allow the depression and workaholism to "take away" from your relationship without saying a word because you didn't think you had a right…or didn't want him to leave…or get more depressed?

codependency manifests in many different ways…and tho you may not have acted the same way you did with others, there may be other symptoms that came out, like accepting his depression and giving him "space" when he was depressed, even if it meant giving up time or an outing or something you wanted to do.

It is hard to move on…but perhaps reading codependent no more will help you recognize some of the other symptoms and maybe help you heal and move on.

4:50 pm
March 19, 2007


El Toro 415

New Member

posts -1

We all understand,You have to understand that the heart is for feelings and what you going through is natural. This is the time where you use your brain. And get through this intellectually. As this man is not for you. I know it is tough but it is really the only way to handle it. Unfortunately, it takes devastation for many of us to realize this. Its tough because of the emotions but it is the only rational solution. Good Luck.

5:35 pm
March 19, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

Hi. Thanks to all have responded. I just wanted to comment on something RisingFromtheAshes mentioned.

I did not think I was in a codependent relationship with this man. But I am absolutely guilty of some of the behaviors that you mentioned. For example, I certainly did not want to rock the boat and I did avoid saying certain things knowing that it would cause an argument or disagreement. I did accept his depression and certainly gave him his space, but what choice did I have? Although, I did not think it was my job to cheer him up. His depression and his workaholism did "take away" from the relationship and I suppose I allowed it. But, again, I guess I did not feel I had any choice. You brought up some really good points. And I will think about what you suggested. You know, I alerady read the book Codependency No More. I guess I need to read it again. Thanks for your insights. S.S.

5:47 pm
March 19, 2007


nappy

New Member

posts -1

Codependency is a strong word. It is so strong sometimes that some people can't even say it because they don't want to say that it might be true that they are codependent. There is nothing wrong by being codependent, we are not bad people. But what we should do is recogize what is going on in our relationship. We need to know what part that other person played and we need to no what part we play in.
We all are codependent, but like I said before. There is some that is more then the other. There is some that can handle problems and there are some that can't.
But what I have learned about being codependent is that guess what? We have choices in life, our life. We have choices to say that no matter how much I love that person, if he is not treating me right, then he will have to go. I am a better person then that, to just have to accept what he is giving me and I should just take it.
You have to know what you can control and what you can't. If he is married to his work, then let his work have him. He has some issue with codependency and you can't fix him.
You can stand naked in front of his computer and he will still not see you. And when that happen, then you know that it is time for him to go. Why should you let him finish his unpleasant business in your life. If he gone, then let him go and then you start to fix on you. Do what you need to do to get yourself over him. Why would you want someone to be depress all the time when life is so grand just to be alive. Just that you deserve more in life, not to be second best in someone who don't even know it.

12:40 pm
March 20, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

Having a bad day. I thought I was doing better until I came across a card that my exbf gave me awhile ago. I read it and just lost it. Going through the day is so hard. At work, I put a phoney smile on my face – all the while I am crying inside. It is quite unbearable. I just mope around, just existing from one day to the next. I dread the moment I wake up because the first thing I think of is what happened and how sad I am. Well thanks everyone for all your wonderful words of wisdom. It certainly does help to read all the insightful comments. I learned a lot about myself and my particular situation. It also helps to see others who have already been through this and who came out a stronger, more confident person. I can't see that happening to me, though. I think my heart needs to mend, first.

1:52 pm
March 20, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

I do know what you mean about waking up and your thoughts are filled with grief. I do know what it's like to have your ever thought when not busy filled with the lose of someone you loved.
The heart does heal, it takes time just like any other injury.

I have a thought of my own here I'd like to share with you.

My thought is, what will your reaction be when he does contact you?

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

7:11 pm
March 20, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

I do not think he is going to call me. He did call once, but that was only to thank me for wishing him a happy birthday. The phone call seemed to be going fine, until I asked if I could call him back later because I had an appointment to keep. He said "Well, I did not really want to talk, I just wanted to thank you for wishing me a happy birthday." My heart just dropped. I have not called him since (and he has not called me either). I just don't understand how his feelings for me did an about face.

To answer your question, I really have no idea how I would react. I guess I can't even think about that, because I just don't think it is going to happen. :-(

8:30 pm
March 20, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

I don't ask because I think he is going to call now. I ask because when these things happen, when you have moved on, when you have accepted he's gone, they seem to re-appear leaving us more confused then ever and opening almost healed wombs.
Whether they stroll back into our lives as if nothing has happened or they call wanting to suddenly work it all out because they miss us and our friendship, we are never prepared for the emotional roller coaster ride we are thrown on.
The first time this happened to me I was just so relieved, thrilled and happier then ever. But as suddenly as he left the first time, the second time it didn't seem to take as long before he disappeared again.
And what I learned from that experience was that I was not prepared at all for that to happen again.
With emotionally unavailable men, once they get too close for comfort they need to step back, sometimes way back in order to gain control over there emotions. Addicts especially have trouble with closeness and emotions. When those emotions subside, when they are left alone with themselves, they tend to reach out again.
I’m not saying this is going to happen, I just want you to think about it and about how you might prepare yourself if it does.
When we love someone so much we are so willing to accept what little they tend to offer us thinking it will get better.
Maybe he will never contact you again and maybe he will call you next month, just something to think about.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

9:12 pm
March 20, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

Atalose-

You are a very wise woman. I always look forward to what you have to say.

You are remarkably insightful. I always appreciate your feedback.

Sad Sack

4:16 pm
March 23, 2007


Anonymous

New Member

posts -1

Hi sad sack,

I am also broken hearted so I was immediately drawn to your thread. It helped reading the process that you seem to be going through and the wonderful comments/advice/suggestions made here. I am not exactly where you are. I made the mistake of contacting him and I believe it just made matters worse. How do you stay away? I find it so hard. I wish I could be stronger. I will keep reading here and hopefully I will find strength. I too am so sad. Each day is just so painful. I can't stand it. I thought (just as you did) that things were going fairly well. You will be in my thoughts. Stay strong and I will try to do the same.

7:05 pm
March 23, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

YankeeFan – It is really hard for me too. The weekend is the worst time for me because I have so much free time on my hands. It is much better when I must report to a job. My mind is occupied. I dread the next few days. Last weekend was awful, but I hope this weekend will be better. I know it is so hard not to contact him. As I mentioned before, my ex does send me a text message from time to time. I do write back when he sends one. His text messages are very weird. It is as if nothing has happened – as if he has no idea how much I am hurting. I don't understand him at all. I tell myself not to write back but then I weaken and send a response. So I am not as strong as you might think. The good thing is that I have not cried in about three days. For about a month, I cried everyday (and as I have said, I am not a crier at all). Perhaps, I am adapting more to the breakup. Well yankeefan keep logging on to the site. I guarantee you will find some wonderful advice. Perhaps post your own thread, and you will see how quickly people will offer you valuable and inspirational words of wisdom. Good night.

12:07 am
March 24, 2007


fantasyland

New Member

posts -1

Hi Sad sack, I didn't have the link to this thread on my desktop, and just now sighed in to my laptop and was anxious to read this thread and to see how you've been doing.I've been reading all the replies here and rememeber how much these boards helped me over the years. Last November (05)I bought a new computer, and in the switchover, lost the link to this site, so the post I posted to you a few days ago was my first time back. I don't have time to write right now, but I did want to say that "yes siree girlfriend, we DO deserve better!!" We need to work on ourselves, and what's best for us! If they say they don't deserve us, heck, they MUST be right! ;) This place is so wonderful! I don't know if this sounds bad, and if it does, I apologize, but it sure is helpful knowing 'I'm' not the only one going through this s**t, you know? Keep up the good work SS, and yes, it's painful for sure, but the no contact you're still doing is the best thing! I'll be back tomorrow when I have more time to write! Hugs to you and to all of you going through this difficult and painful stuff! FL

1:27 am
March 24, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

Sad Sack,

If you had broken your leg I'm sure the steps you'd take would be to protect it with a cast and allow it time to heal. A broken heart is no different. You need to protect your heart, those text messages from him are like little pangs that keep you from healing. Especially if he is acting as if nothing at all has happened. When you respond to him you are telling him his behavior about what he did to you is acceptable. I don’t think you believe it is acceptable, your heart certainly is telling you it wasn’t acceptable. And I would imagine that after you do respond your not feeling really good about yourself either.

By you responding, do you feel that maybe it will make things ok and he’ll come back?
I remember having those kinds of thoughts, if I was nice and pleasant and let him work out his issues then we’d work out, WRONG. Looking back now all I did was set the tone and acceptance level for his ill behavior. I learned it didn’t matter what his issues were or how much compassion I felt because of his family history. The bottom line was he was doing what he needed to do in order to gain control over his emotions and fears, he needed to not be close to me, not involved or committed in any way. My emotions, my fears and my needs didn’t even cross his mind. And because I was being nice and replying to his short one line e-mails when he felt like sending them I was letting him know it was ok that he just backed off left without a word and stopped calling. The e-mail was safe for him, just like your exbf with his text messages. There is no interpersonal involvement through e-mail or text messages.

Nobody likes to feel guilty about there own behavior but we make it easy for them. When that finally sunk in with me, I moved to the anger stage, no more tears, no more feeling sorry for myself or filling my head with thoughts of him coming back and how I would make things different this time. That anger did me allot of good, it was like the medicine I needed to help with healing my broken heart.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

7:59 am
March 24, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

Hi FantasyLand and Atalose. It was great hearing from the both of you. And thanks again for your continued support and comforting words. Fantasy Land – No, it doesn't sound bad when you say you are glad that you are not the only one going through this. I know what you mean. I, too, find some comfort in knowing I am not alone and that others have gone through this and have come out stronger and wiser individuals. This site is a blessing. As I mentioned, I do feel a bit better than last week at this time and I attribute it to the wonderful advice I have received here. So thanks again and please stay in touch. I look forward to your insightful responses.

Atalose – you are just so wise. You are right, of course, about the message I am sending when I do respond to his text messages. I think for me, it is just so hard to completely let go. Intellectually, I know the relationship is over. But emotionally, I still feel as long as I am communicating even the slightest bit, there is still some sort of connection. I know how pathetic that sounds. I guess I am not at the place where I could completely give him up. (even though it was quite easy for him to give me up). I know it will take time. But like I said, I am feeling much better than last week. And I am hoping that next week, I will feel even better. Your second paragraph was right on target. I guess I am still hoping that he will come back to me. You have to remember that this just happened. The wounds are still fresh. I still love him so. I am 51 years old and never met a man as wonderful as him. He appreciated me, made me feel special, made me laugh, made me think, was truly interested in me. His removing himself from my life(the way he did) was so out of character for him. I am not writing this to excuse his behavior. I am telling you this so you understand how hard it is for me to completely let go of him. I am hoping that with time, I will be able to gather the strength and not respond to his noncommittal text messages. I will read your last response over and over and hopefully that will give me the strength to become a certified member of the "no contact" club. Thanks again for your support. I will be forever grateful that I was fortunate to find this site.

10:15 am
March 24, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

If only our hearts and our heads came together at the same time over the same things. I truely do understand the wanting him to come back. I also went through that so I do understand and I know how hard it is. If only I am able to help someone not go through it as long as I did would make me feel better. The pain and hurt I suffered for so long holding onto the same kind of man, a man who made me laugh, made me feel special and appreciated. It was hard giving up all those thoughts and feelings and accept the reality of it all.
What I learned was yes he did care for me most likely fell in love with me, that was the problem. The closeness the intimacy the needing of someone else that took away form his very core of being alone, facing the world alone and dealing with life alone. No matter what I could have done, what I could have said was not going to change his core. The chance of him seeking counseling was slim to none and if he had, the years of therapy it would have taken where would that have left me and our relationship.
Someone on here was said, "you don't need a fixer upper" there are allot of healthy men out there.
Take your time in your healing, do what makes you feel better and one day both your heart and head will be on the same page. Until then, know you have support here and open ears ready to listen.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

10:31 am
March 24, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

Atalose – thanks again for your prudent advice. I am looking forward to the day where my heart and head are on the same page (well put!). I am not anywhere near that, but please know that you ARE helping me. I may not be at a place to completely let go, but as you know it is a process. I am getting better. I actually went to the gym this morning which is something I haven't done since the breakup. I am still so sad, but I am not crying. I am able to go about my daily actiivies a bit better than last week. Oh, I wanted to mention that this morning I received a text message from my ex. It read (verbatim): "Please try to have a good Saturday. I think about you a lot and always hope that you are ok." Of course, it pulled at my heart. But I did not respond. I felt like sending a TM back immediately saying : "No, I am NOT okay, you idiot!!!!". But of course, I did not do that. But I was wondering if I should take this opportunity to let him know how I am hurting and how sad I am. Or do you think I should not even go there? I am curious what you think. I will take time and think before I respond to him (if I even respond). I do love him.

5:34 pm
March 24, 2007


atalose

Member

posts 18

I think you need to do what feels right for you. If responding to him and telling him how you feel is what feels right, then do it. It’s like leaving unfinished business and you have a need or desire to finish it or understand it better. There is nothing wrong with that, other wise you may keep yourself stuck in a place kicking yourself for not telling him what was on your mind.

When you respond (and I know you will LOL) say something like this:
I often think about you as well with much confusion and disheartens as to what happened between us. And leave it at that, see if he responds or not. Keep it simple especially with text messages. If he opens the door to a discussion, do it on the phone or in person not through text messages or e-mails if you can help it.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

9:48 pm
March 24, 2007


sad sack

Member

posts 77

I was debating all day whether to respond to his text message and what to say if and when I do. But you will be surprised that I have yet to respond (which is a first for me). I usually respond almost immediately. If I send a text message, I can only use 70 characters so it is unlikely that I would write anything meaningful there. I was thinking of writing an e-mail so I could write a bit more, but I still don't know if I should. I will let some time pass and hopefully I will feel comfortable with the decision I make. WIth regard to his text message, one thing that came to my mind is that if he is so concerned if I am okay, then why doesn't he just pick up the phone. How concerned can he really be? And how can he be so insensitive to my feelings? He has to have some idea how I am hurting over here. I was sort of confused by that TM. Do you think he is so self-absorbed that he is absolutely clueless that I am in pain? I just don't know what to think anymore. All I know is that I miss him so much and that I am so sad that what we had is over. Well thanks to everyone for their support. I definitely feel much better than I did just a week ago today. I did not have a great day today, but at least I got out of the bed, went to the gym and did some chores. Last week, I felt paralyzed, unable to move, unable to accomplish anything. SO thanks to all.


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